I am a 52 year old male, but since I was a kid this has always been a problem for me. I spoke to a college psychologist about this behavior when I was only 18, but we never really addressed the underlying problem.
My problem is that I do, and have always done, things that I know might hurt me and I just can't understand why. I take risks, knowing that it will hurt me, and it most often does, but I do it anyway. Things like unprotected sex, not taking care of my health, not cleaning my home, not cleaning my body, not paying my bills on time, eating far too much food and allowing myself to gain over 100 lbs, not emptying my trash for weeks.
Why is this? How can I stop this behavior? What am I seeking? What is going on in my head? What caused this behavior in the first place? What in my early life could have been the trigger for this behavior to have started?
Self-Defeating Behaviors: Free Yourself from the Habits, Compulsions, Feelings, and Attitudes That Hold You Back.