Self-Defeating Behavior

by Matt

I had something really traumatic happen to happen to me a couple years ago and I hit rock bottom. I lost my life savings, my job and my home in the financial crash. I'm 28 and live at my parents. Whenever Something good comes along that will help me get back on my feet I unintentionally ruin it.

Something similar to this happened to me when I was in my late teens when I lost someone I loved very much. After, whenever I was in a relationship and It began to get serious I would end it. As I get older I distance myself from relationships altogether. If a girl likes me I'll find a reason why I don't want to be with them and I'll just stay alone instead.

I'm in my late 20's and I don't know why I do these things. Just yesterday I was supposed to go see a girl that is interested in me and instead of calling her and meeting up with her I just stayed home. It's like I'm afraid of where it may go. Can someone please help me better understand?